This past weekend I organised a trip with some new friends of mine. The amazing thing was, that even though we’ve only crossed paths a couple of times, it feels like we've know each other for much, much longer.
Over the past few years, I've realised that these types of relationships are becoming more and more common for me and I’m starting to realise why that is.
Many years ago, I was quite shy, socially awkward and had no idea about how to make friends. I would people-please and always be agreeable, so that everyone would like me. And I had a lot of people who liked me, but I felt empty inside, lacking any feelings of true connection. I never understood why this was and just decided it was the way things were going to be.
Over the years though, I came to realise that there was nothing wrong with me, but I’d just been attracting the wrong kind of people. Instead of being myself, I would put on different personas, different masks, depending on who I was around. We all do this - We act a certain way at work, a certain way at home, a certain way in front of young children, a certain way in front of strangers - however, I think we’ve got it all wrong.
You see, everything started to change for me when I realised I had so many different versions of myself. I was confused as to which one I truly was. Was I the person I was in front of family? Maybe the one in front of friends? Or was it the one when I was in front of strangers? The answer was none of the above. The solution? Figuring out who I really was.
Once I had taken a step back and started listening to myself (what I wanted to do, where I wanted to go, who I wanted to be), everything starting changing and I felt the connections with people getting deeper and deeper.
Achieving deep meaningful connections all starts with ourselves. Figuring out who we are and loving ourselves enough to go out into the world without the fear of rejection. If we go out with our masks on, we may feel a little safer, but we end up attracting people who are attracted to that mask. If we go out as our authentic selves, yes, some people won’t like us, some people will reject us and some will even put us down, but when you finally come across someone who is just like you, it is the most blissful, fulfilling and energising thing a human being can feel.
Remove your mask. Let us see the real you.